Things we are sort of guessing – Hull City

Hull are leaving the city of culture and visiting the city of Colman's, and so our Little Yellow Birds are back to make their usual wayward guesses. 

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After an international break so free of incident we might as well have locked ourselves in a cupboard for two weeks, proper football is back! The Little Yellow Bird team have prepared themselves for the visit of Hull by doing some guessing.

For Hull City, September had been a colossal mess until they brought the month to a close with a staggering 6-1 victory over footballing disasters Birmingham. Was this a complete anomaly - the previous five fixtures had seen three defeats and two draws - or a sign that things are on the up?

It’s certainly true that Hull have had a difficult start to life back in the Championship. They were on a hiding to nothing last year in the Premier League, with a threadbare squad and nothing to spend. Marco Silva worked wonders but couldn’t stave off the inevitable, and now the fantastically-named-and-lipped Leonid Slutsky is in charge of a young and inexperienced side.

The Tigers are 17th in the table which is only really starting to just about take shape, but they’ve scored more goals than any other team in the league, twice as many as Norwich indeed. However they also ship goals and have only kept one clean sheet in the league this season, and that was against footballing fiasco Bolton Wanderers.

David Meyler and Michael Dawson have bags of experience, and Fraizer Campbell will always be a threat, so we must underestimate Hull at our peril. But is this an excellent opportunity for three more points and another wander up the league?

Fun fact:

Hull manager Leonid Slutsky was a promising young goalkeeper when at just 19 he climbed into a tree to rescue a cat, just to impress a girl. This act of bold and heroic heroism went completely tits up and Slutsky fell, shattering his leg, nose and any chances with the hot mama. He never played professional football again.


ZW: I really hope the week or so off has been useful for the players who put so much effort into the run in September. That would be preferable to it simply halting all the wonderful momentum we gathered. I feel so positive after the last few games though, that I’m looking forward to a well-rested side getting back into the groove and picking up some more vital points.

Zoë Assumes: no clean sheet, but two goals for us. 2-1 Norwich.

RJ: The denizens of the 2017 UK City of Culture had a slowish start to life back in the Championship, which ended in resounding Fashion as they trounced Birmingham, 6-1, at the KCOM last time out. Leonid Slutsky was spotted playing on a Fairground Attraction at the annual Hull fair this week. Let’s hope he’s heading for a Fall.

Free scoring at home, the Tigers are not up and running away from home yet, with only a few draws to show. So I have High Hopes that over the international break we’ve added goal Kraft to our defensive Werk (bear with me) and we’ll emerge victorious, though Frazier “I’m more Frazy than a Frazer” Campbell usually shithouses a goal against us.

Rich Reckons: One in The Eye Of The Tigers. Kraftwerk 2 - Culture Club  1

CT: Hull are so Norwich 2016/17. Newly relegated. Scoring loads of goals, letting loads in, pretty shit away and throwing in random 6-1 wins. Who knows which Hull will turn up?. Here’s hoping they plump for the shit away version. Will Norwich pick up where they left off or has the international break halted our supersonic trajectory to stardom? So many questions, and I'm bad enough at predictions as it is. Whatever, I'm looking forward to seeing Leonid Slutsky in the dugout. He seems genuinely amazed that he is allowed to be a manager in English football and his silly grin and wide eyed wonder amuses me greatly.

Clare Calculates: Not a scooby-do so I've played eeny meeny miny mo and a 2-1 win for Nodge came out.

SW: Remember when Hull’s owner tried to change their name to Hull City Tigers on the basis it was more brandable? Good times, man, good times. I think they should have gone one step further and adopted a full-blown Pro Evolution Soccer 2004 name like Humberside Wild Cats or something. Alternatively, one might say the best strategy for brandability is to like, y’know, win matches, rather than losing them which they’ve done their fair share of this season. They’ve scored plenty of goals, but the Timm-Zimm Wall is now a more robust monument than the Humber Bridge, so I’m confident.  

Seb Foresees: A very good 2-0 win.

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